Getting Organized at Home, Part 1

8
Oct

Organized! (Photo credit: mgstanton)

Does anyone else think it’s hard to stay organized?

Does anyone else have a hard time getting organized in the first place?

Man, I’ve got other things I want to do.

There are a lot of more interesting activities than sorting papers or changing over clothes from one season to the next.

Bo-ring.

If I leave a stack of stuff in the corner for long enough, I don’t even see it anymore. And if I don’t see it, it doesn’t exist, right?

Not quite.

I’ve been getting after my kids about throwing their stuff on the floor rather than putting it away, but truth be told, I’m not a great example. While I might not throw it on the floor, I set down onto any convenient flat surface books, papers, stray earrings, pencil-top erasers, hair binders, chapstick and other miscellaneous items…

And then forget about them.

My dresser top is a disaster right now.

Five Minute Chunk

Part of my problem is that I don’t know where to start. Here’s how this process usually goes:

I consider where to start. I feel motivated and have a mental list of my goals.

I look around at the various options of things to handle. I feel overwhelmed.

I begin organizing one area, and while returning things to their proper place, I find a new task that needs attention. I get distracted by this new task and forget about the other one I was doing.

This process continues until I have five projects going all at once and the place looks ten times worse than it did before I started.

I feel discouraged.

I feel angry.

I abandon all projects and remove myself to a different location. Or I throw everything in a garbage bag and put it in the trash, only to discover there were important items that needed follow up, which was why they had been kept in the first place but now they’re long gone and my bill is overdue. The collectors come and repossess my house, my car and my bike and I have to go live under a bridge.

Which is a bummer.

Okay, that last part hasn’t happened but I have been drastic and thrown things out in a organizing-induced fury only to regret it later.

The way I’ve learned to handle myself so I don’t go all nuts-o is to stick to one area and work on it in five minute chunks.

You can do anything for five minutes, right?

At first it is harder than it sounds, since I apparently have the attention span of a gerbil. But as I remind myself to stay with the project at hand, I can get a surprising amount done in five minutes.

Then I can go play.

If I stick to the five minutes, I don’t have time to make piles of projects strewn about the house. I take care of the one, then I can gauge if I want to continue or if it has grown tiresome and I feel like doing something totally different. Usually it is the latter, but sometimes I see the progress I made and feel inspired to press on. Breaking it into manageable time portions helps keep it do-able, rather than seeing ALL the projects and feeling like I must complete them ALL AT ONCE.

I’ll admit this is a weak spot for me, so I’m open to suggestions. I know some of y’all are organizing machines, so please help those of us who are less gifted.

Why Get Organized?

There are some houses I’ve visited where everything was meticulous. You weren’t sure if you should even sit on the couch because it looked like no one had ever sat there before. Everything was pristine and it almost looked like it was a model home — nobody lived there.

I don’t want a house like that.

I’m okay with a little mess. (Some might say that I’m okay with A LOT of mess.)

When we have people to our home, including kids, I want them to feel welcomed and comfortable. If something gets spilled, nobody’s going to freak. If somebody needs to come in from a rainy or snowy day, I don’t want them worrying about messing up my entryway.

However, when things get too disorganized, there are no signals to people, or rather there are too many signals. “Put your stuff EVERYWHERE!” the signals say.

When things are tidied up, it is easier to notice things that are out of place. This makes it easier to maintain; it’s just getting to that point that’s hard.

Here are some reasons to get organized:

Organized! (Photo credit: nicholasjon)

To create or positively contribute to a sense of order, structure and peace

If things are a mess and you can’t find stuff, you get stressed out.

To avoid injury.

If you trip over toys left on the floor, you get mad or even hurt, and that’s no fun.

To allow family members to grow in independence

If you have a spot you keep certain items, people in the family know where to find certain items when they are needed (ie. pencil sharpener, keys, tape, etc.) and can do so on their own.

It leads (eventually) to more enjoyable time being together

When I sit down at home and see hair balls floating down the hallway, it isn’t as much fun to sit and relax. I’m better off taking the time to invest in a little cleaning/organizing now in order to better enjoy my down-time later.

It makes me more inclined to have people over (kids and grown-ups)

I’m more inclined to say yes to my kids ideas of having friends over, and I’m more apt to offer my home as a meeting place if I don’t feel embarrassed about the state of things or wish I had a spot for my friend to sit but too bad because it is covered in magazines and dish towels.

Getting organized allows more space for relationships to happen. And while I’m not super keen on organizing, I’m all about relationships. So today I’m going to work in five minute chunks to tackle a couple messy areas and contribute to the atmosphere of my home. If I’m not back in a couple days, send somebody over to check on me.) 🙂

What are some ways you stay organized? Is there a certain household task that you dread? If you’re going to put off cleaning, what is your favorite excuse?

Shorts as Battlefield

30
Sep

“I’m not wearing them.”

My son had no other clean shorts.

The only other clothes for his lower half were a pair of jeans.

It was forecasted to be 80 degrees.

He runs hot.

Jeans were not an option.

“What is wrong with them? You liked them when we bought them, they look nice on you, so what’s the problem?” I demanded.

“They’re too fancy. They’re church shorts,” he answered.

This coming from the kid who never has to dress up for church. He associates anything other than basketball shorts with “dressing up”. If only he knew what real “dressing up” was, he would not complain.

This is also coming from the kid who usually just grabs whatever from the drawer and throws it on without much thought.

The other two kids had their teeth brushed and backpacks loaded.

Princess Teacup needed to put on her socks and get her hair pulled up.

Bobo was already out the door, waiting for the bus.

The bus was due to come in three minutes.

‘I am willing to go down with this ship,’ I thought.

I had already explained how the shorts he pulled out of the dirty clothes hamper were in there because they were d.i.r.t.y. And if they’d been put in the hamper while they were NOT dirty, then that was too bad ’cause they’d been smushed up against dirty stuff and were now dirty by association. The blue khaki shorts were his only option, but Rex had decided they were a non-contender.

He was now in his bed, refusing to get dressed.

The bus came at 8:18 on the dot. Now it is this time:

Rather than being on my child who is now on the bus, this is where I find important items:

I Am Willing to Die on This Hill

For clarification purposes I should probably let you know that about a week ago I warned my boys that if they didn’t clean up their room by a specific time I would clean it, and all the stuff I cleaned up would go away for a while. I wouldn’t throw it out or donate it, but it would just “go away” for an irritating amount of time.

They cleaned up what their eyes saw, and later on I cleaned up everything that my eyes saw.

Let’s just say there was a lot of stuff in my bag.

Amongst all the toys, there were many articles of clothing in my bag, probably some of the shorts that Rex was now missing.

There are a couple things I would like to get on the record.

I am not an unreasonable person , not a control freak in any way.
I do not have rigorous standards with my children.
It is reasonable for kids to put dirty clothes in the hamper rather than on the floor.

Thanks, I feel better now that you know.

Since I am the person who does the laundry, I don’t appreciate washing clean clothes just because the hamper was the location that required less effort than folding a still-clean shirt and putting it back in the drawer. Am I crazy? Do all the other moms wash clothes even thought they aren’t dirty? Do I have an unfair expectation here?

I say thee Nay!

People of the cloth and soap, we must rise up against the forces that would demand we wash perfectly clean clothes! Think of the wasted time, electricity, water and detergent!

Nay!

After a brief cooling-off period, I returned to his room and told Rex I had come up with a compromise. If he would just put on the shorts, I would tell him what it was. He put them on, and I started to tell him the compromise, but once he had them on, he immediately realized that they are comfortable shorts.

He has friends who wear similar shorts.

He can still move in the shorts.

He likes the shorts.

I could just pinch him.

The crisis now averted, we loaded up the car and I backed out of the driveway.

He stretched out his ever-growing legs, propped them up on the armrests which are usually protected by his siblings and said,

“Ah, now I can lay out and relax. Maybe I should do this every day.”

The look I gave him in the rearview mirror made him grin and say, “But I won’t.”

Do you have battles with anyone in your family? How do you decide which things to let go? Do you have any tricks to help kids (or adults) keep their rooms clean?

Five Minute Friday: Red

6
Sep

Timer set for five minutes. Ready. Set. GO.

I lost my crockpot.

Don’t ask me how.

If I could retrace my steps and figure out how I lost it, I’d be able to find it.

And I can’t.

It’s not like a chapstick or a pencil. You don’t have another one laying around in the bottom of a drawer someplace. It’s definitely not a huge deal, but when you’ve started using one, you find it is a nice option to have.

So when I took my son to his friend’s house, I told the funny story of not being able to find it. “Who loses a crockpot?!” I joked.

The mom said, “Do you want one of mine?”

Huh??

She told me she had an extra one she never uses, an inexpensive one she picked up somewhere along the way, one she didn’t need.

My pride department wanted to keep me from taking it. But my time management department told me I could really use it. And she was being generous, offering me a gift. She wouldn’t offer if she didn’t want to.

So I took the crockpot, almost accidentally broke it on the way out the door. and now my family can have shredded pork tacos again. But the takeaway is that I almost missed out on the chance to be part of this new friend’s story of generosity. My pride almost kept me from allowing her to help me. And how often, especially as moms, do we choose to tough it out because we don’t want to admit we need help?

STOP

******

Like most Fridays, this post is part of a linkup with Lisa-jo Baker’s Five Minute Fridays. You write for five minutes flat, then linkup your post on her website: http://lisajobaker.com . Check it out for more details, but if you’re interested in finding other writers to connect with, Five Minute Fridays is a great way to do so.

Can I ask you to consider subscribing to this blog? You can click the little link on the bar over there —-> and any new posts will be delivered to your inbox. No pressure, but it would be a sure way to keep up on all the action (snort chuckle). Thanks for coming by today, and I hope you have a great weekend!

Five Minute Friday: In-Between

29
Jun

Today’s post is part of a larger link up with Lisa-Jo Baker. She organizes Five Minute Friday. Anyone can participate, and you can find more details here: http://lisajobaker.com The idea is to write without censoring ourselves, nitpicking details or worrying about every little nuance. Turn off the perfectionism and release yourself to write for the pure pleasure of it using the word prompt she supplies each week. I personally invite you to give it a try — it’s a great way to find other interesting blogs and it is amazing how many different angles there can be from one word.

Word Prompt: In-Between

Ready. Set. GO.

I hate being in-between. I’ve felt in-between so many times in so many situations over the years that I’ve come to dread it.

In-between jobs, in-between life stages, in transition, inconvenient, insecure.

As a kid, I was in-between a lot. My dad was a pastor and I often felt stretched thin. There was the desire to shrug off the expectations of my family and of my faith, and just do what everyone else was doing. But when I tried that route, I didn’t fit where I thought others did, feeling instead guilt and self-consciousness at my discomfort in situations I knew were dicey. I couldn’t just shut down my conscience and roll with it.

Now that I’m adult, I feel in-between again. My husband and I chose to have me stay at home with the kids while they were little. I was 100% onboard. Now my youngest is getting ready to start kindergarten in the fall, and this opens up possibilities…

…or uncertainty.

You know, whichever you prefer.

The part of me that decided to stay home wants that availability for my children, wants the convenience of doing errands while the rest of the world is hard at work, wants to be the volunteer at the field trip, program or other kid activity.

The part of me that desires to do something other than take care of the kids, husband and home, that part of me is conflicted because, having been home for more than eight years, I feel like I’m back at the beginning again. Starting over. Any experience or education I had seems antiquated and obsolete. How does one start up an engine that has been sitting in the back 40 collecting rust?

artist in turkey (Photo credit: Maria & Michal P.)

There are gazillions of women like me, I don’t think for one second I’m alone in this, but it is hard to know where to begin again. The in-between feels so much like being set back, like restarting the life I had previously, before children, instead of being a new adventure.

I think that if I can tutor myself, tell myself those things I would tell my kids about attitude, new beginnings and taking chances, this in-between might be more comfortable, more positive, a year full of possibilities and rediscovering passions. And maybe in the midst of starting a new stage of our lives together as a family, we will all come to appreciate each other and who we all are as developing individuals, even their mom.

STOP

What do you think about your life station? What are you in-between right now? How do you deal stay positive during life transitions?

Five Minute Friday: Fall

7
Jun

This is after it’s been tidied. Scary.

There are tumbleweeds of dog fur in the corner next to the buffet, the surface of which is covered in papers, pencil boxes and mail, rendering the buffet virtually undetectable.

There is an un-emptied suitcase at the foot of our bed from a trip taken three weeks ago. It’s not that I don’t need the clothes that might be in the suitcase, it’s that I’ve worn the same jeans every day this week, and that makes for a much lighter laundry load.

The children are required to make a path through their rooms from the door to their beds so I don’t trip on stuff, should they need me in the middle of the night. But as for putting away these items, it hasn’t happened lately.

My oldest son was supposed to have a friend over but I forgot to call the parent and solidify details. The gift we bought for our favorite teacher is still sitting on my kitchen counter — school was done last week.

If you wash the rugs in the bathroom, it makes it look like you have probably washed the actual floor.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/67774014@N00/7438145050

Why do I get bothered by these and other things I see as indicators of my own shortcomings?

Why do I expect certain things from myself that I wouldn’t expect from any one else?

In reverse, I make excuses for the things I have done. I made scones for a friend’s visit this week. She complimented them and I downplayed it. Even though it has been raining and generally icky outside, I have managed to split hostas, remove grass and replant or pot up at least 20 plants. But it doesn’t seem like a drop in the bucket compared to the other things on my list, so I decide that effort doesn’t count.What if we all, specifically all of us women and/or mothers, decided to cut ourselves some slack? What if we admitted that we don’t have to have it all figured out every moment of every day? What if we stopped expecting perfection from ourselves?

If that happened, I think we would start to realize no one expected it from us, that it was self-imposed.

And besides, no one was buying the image of perfection we thought we projected.

Let’s allow the façade to fall away and reveal the real imperfect us – quirky, overwhelmed, loving, strong, flawed, fully-human us. And we are amazing. We are beautiful.

This post is part of a link up with Lisa-jo Baker and Five Minute Friday. Check out all the details here: http://lisajobaker.com/ It is open to anyone. Come shake yourself out of the shackles of self-critique and write for the sheer pleasure of it. Today’s word prompt was Fall.